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Archive for March 22nd, 2012

Subject: Why Children Are Violent
Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2012 21:58:36 -0000
From:
To: AM-GLOBAL

Baba

== WHY CHILDREN ARE VIOLENT ==

Namaskar,
Each and every day, as never before, we hear the shocking news about our teenagers committing heinous crimes: Murder, rape, bombings, and more. This is most rampant now in the US. Just this week a “normal” high school student in Ohio open fired in the school cafeteria killing and injuring several students.

What has experts and officials concerned is that such type of unruly & ghastly incidents are becoming more and more common. Especially in our so-called advanced nations where youths are engaging in terribly destructive and savage behaviour.

The questions naturally arise: How & why are such horrific tragedies increasing? Why are children in “First-World” countries resorting to such dastardly acts? These are but a couple of the burning questions of the day. Of course, side by side, our Revered Sadguru Baba has already addressed and given the solution to these types of tragic social woes.

BABA’S TEACHING

MISSING INGREDIENT: LOVE AND AFFECTION

Looking back at the history, Baba clearly unveils that an imbalanced or broken family severely adversely affects the children’s growth and thrusts them into “a sea of troubles”.

Baba says, “The male libertines would not take responsibility for their offspring. They used to wander freely, and as a result, the entire responsibility for raising the children in their infancy would devolve on the mothers. But it was not possible for the mothers alone to bear the responsibility of maintaining the children, as a result of which many children died in early infancy. Those who survived felt themselves to be in a sea of troubles after they were weaned from their mother’s breast milk. Then they would be deprived of their mother’s love, since she had to take care of the next baby. Those were the days of the prehistoric humans.” (Namah Shiva Shantaya: Shivokti-2)

In His above guideline, Baba is graphically showing what happens when the mother and father are unable to provide a proper environment for their child. Specifically, when the father abandons the mother and child then the mother is left to carry the full burden of rearing the child(ren) all by herself. As a lone parent, she is unable to secure and provide the food and spend ample time nurturing and loving the children. It is just not possible to work all day and then raise the child as well.

Baba says, “It is extremely inconvenient and difficult for her [the mother] to give her child all-round grooming [and love] and make adequate provision for food, clothes, education and medical care all by herself.” (Human Society – 1, Social Justice)

The key missing ingredient is that when children are not given the heart-felt love and attention that they need, then those kids have little chance of ‘making it’ in the world. They may not physically die, but internally there is a terrible void that casts a dark shadow on their entire existence.

Here following Baba furthermore points out how one of the key aspects needed for the wholesome development of the child is motherly love and affection. And that love cannot be fully provided in a child-care situation. It is just not the same.

And if that is blatantly missing or absent – for whatever reason – then the child’s emotional growth will be severely hampered and stunted. They will lack those “sweeter and finer sensibilities” that are unique to human existence and so very vital for each and every person.

Baba says, “It was not easy to know the fathers of children even in the case of the so-called householders, far less in that of the libertines. Children would know only their mothers. And after they were weaned, they would forget their mothers also. Thus being deprived of motherly love and affection at a very early age, they had no opportunity to develop the sweeter and finer sensibilities of the human mind. The human mind, the human intellect, was nipped in the bud; those people had no opportunity to blossom, to gladden the heart of the world with their sweet joy.” (Namah Shiva Shantaya:
Shivokti-2)

The overall message is that strong, cooperative parental involvement is needed in raising a child. A certain physical and psychic base or stability must be provided by the father and the mother must have ample scope to shower her maternal love and compassion on the child. These are the necessary ingredients and when they are missing then the whole situation turns sour. In that case the child cannot grow properly and often their entire life ends up in disaster.

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “DEVELOPED” AND “UNDEVELOPED” NATIONS

Nowadays in our so-called third and first world nations, there is a blatant dichotomy – though admittedly this gap is fast decreasing as materialism continue to spread its web throughout this earth.

In general though, especially in places like India, the mothers keep their children nestled in their arms and under their close care throughout the day. No doubt they may not be able to supply the child with huge material wealth, but the children grow in an in-tact family surrounded by caring parents and concerned grandparents and a number of aunts and uncles. But first and foremost, the mother’s entire focus of life is on the child and that yields a tremendously positive result. Internally, the child feels nurtured and secure.

Of course, sadly this is now slipping away as capitalism and materialism sink deeper into the fabric of Indian society. In this regard, India is actually in a tailspin. So it is not that all of India is perfect in child rearing and all of the west is deficient of child rearing. There are many stellar parents in the US as well as sub-par parents in India. So here we are talking about the overall trends and norms of east and west over the last 40 years or so.

Keeping this in mind, in our developed nations, the general tendency is quite different. Divorce is rampant, often times both parents have full-time jobs, and in some cases the parents just prefer their own privacy away from their children. With these factors having a dominant effect, there is now an entire generation of children coming into the world who lack that most basic and fundamental human need: Love– motherly love.

On the outside it may sometimes look like those children have everything: a fancy house, all the technological games and gadgets, and so many toys and gifts etc. But on the inside their heart is not satisfied. Due to the pressure of circumstances or outright neglect, they did not receive that loving compassion that is so much required for their welfare.

In result these children could not create a loving relationship with others – all due to their own emotional deficiency. Because of years of neglect or partial neglect, they have a disconnct with the greater society. They do not look upon others with love and affection. The results thereof are absolutely disastrous. As kids, this may not be so apparent as those young children are still young. But as they grow and interact with the world they become extremely harmful – they are veritable threats to social well-being. They harass their colleagues, elders, children, and the disabled and infirmed.

Putting such alienated persons in jail is not the proper answer either, not is a juvenile detention center. But because that is what is “easy” to do, the so-called stewards of society ship these troubled persons to such institutions.

So the situation is indeed grave. And it is further compounded by modernity wherein children are surrounded by violence that is glorified in the form of video games, movies, television, novels and more. This leads children to think of human life as negligible; even they lose the demarcations between real and virtual.

Top of all, lack of motherly love is the chief problem for kids in materialistic countries. And as Baba says, that casts them into a “sea of troubles”.

MORE INCIDENTS

That is why today we see – especially in the USA – children getting involved in an unending array of cruel and unsightly behavior. In the recent past such incidents were unheard of. So this is a new and developing phenomenon in the US and other “first-world” nations like Germany, Great Britain, France etc.

For example, just in the recent days, weeks and months, teens across North America have blown up schools, gang-raped young girls, lit innocent classmates on fire causing severe burns, murdered teachers, robbed the elderly, and so much more. These are the common events.

And now today we have the Ohio school cafeteria massacre to add to this tragic list.

Indeed now there is an unending stream of teenage crimes being committed – and they are crimes of the worst nature.

The response that most states are taking is to try these youths as adults and put them in prison for years and years – if not life. Note: In the US, a life sentence means the entire life whereas throughout much of the world a “life sentence means 10 – 20 years.) But that is not the solution. Rectification and reform time may certainly be necessary, but a prolonged jail term is not nipping the problem in the bud.

If we do not address this core issue of a distinct lack of maternal and parental love, the current problems will only escalate.

Overall, the situation of youth is quite awful in many of our first-world countries. But it is not solely limited to those places. Because as Baba points out the problem begins and ends with motherly love.

From a very early age it is absolute imperative for the child to constantly receive love and affection by having close contact with the mother. Then and only then will the child develop properly emotionally. Yet in many western households, the infant sleeps in their own room, separate from their parents. In that case, the alienation starts at a very young age.

Only with an upsurge of love, will the child’s heart be content and they will not become a burden on this earth.

But when the child grows with an empty or rejected feeling inside due to being tossed aside by the parents, then this psychological void is not easily fixed. For instance, when the children return home from primary and middle school to an empty household, then they feel so lonely. And this loneliness or alienation becomes a life-long problem in which case those children can do untold harm to others. Plus if they become parents themselves then they will do the same mistreatment to their children. So that negative cycle continues on and on.

At the present moment, there is a terrible crisis going on, especially in our first-world countries where the conditions are distinctly less favourable for our young. About this much can be written and everyone is encouraged to share their own perceptions and experiences of this problem, as step by step this is turning into an epidemic.

AM FAMILIES AROUND THE GLOBE

On the positive side, around the globe our AM parents are inculcating a greater and greater sense of neo-humanistic values into their children’s lives and this obviously is having a beneficial outcome. Plus with the growth of cooperatives and Master Units parents have a better opportunity to spend more and more time with their children– when their little ones are in the tender stage of infancy. So by Baba’s grace we are seeing that fatherly support and motherly love and affection that is so vital for the welfare of the child. Here again, I hope everyone will describe some of the successes we are seeing in AM.

CONCLUSION

This entire topic is extremely critical to the well-being of any society. Here are some of the key points:

1. Certainly children need food, medical care, clothing and all the minimum requirements, but those alone are not enough. Children also need love and affection from both parents.

2. One parent alone is not enough. A child needs both a father and a mother. In particular, Baba points out in His Yoga Psychology book that females possess a sentimental quality that is not present in males. There Baba says that females are emotionally more developed than males, and this plays a huge role in the development of the child – if and only if the mother is not shackled by all kinds of existential pressures: food, clothing, housing etc. So really both a father and mother are needed – as males bring to the fold a more logical and stern approach that is needed for keeping children in line, as well as financial means for raising the child.

3. Neo-humanistic education is needed wherein children can develop genuine love for the society. If they get all their social skills from Hollywood movies and video games, then that will be a purely negative teaching. All kinds of benevolent human interactions are needed, especially with the parents.

4. Finally, incarceration is not the answer to childhood alienation and their resultant crimes. Rather, all the missing pieces noted above need to be instilled in the mind of that youth or kid. Then they can start to grow and by Baba’s grace overcome the difficulties.

BABA’S BLESSING

By Baba’s grace and with our heart-felt compassion we will bring the entire humanity into one neo-humanistic flow where all feel cared for and loved.

Baba says, “Marching ahead is jiivan dharma (the characteristic wont of life). To march ahead, carrying all, viewing the world humanity as an integral entity, is the principal aspect of jiivan dharma. Resolve courageously to observe this jiivan dharma…” (A’nanda Va’nii, #43)

Namaskar,
Balakrsna Deva

Note 1: WOMEN NOT CONFINED TO THE HOME

Here no one should be left with the idea that women must remain at home always and they are not to interact in the general society. It is not like that. Baba’s clear-cut guideline is that women can and should work outside the home as needed.

Baba says, “I cannot support the “lofty wisdom” of those people who advise women to spend their lives at home cooking with appliances such as ladles, tongs and pots, because this runs counter to reality.” (Human Society – 1, Social Justice)

Baba says, “Generally it is desirable for women to earn an honest livelihood remaining at home. If it is not possible to maintain the family in this way, women may find employment in more physically strenuous work such as government service, business, etc., outside the home. No one should be conservative or superstitious in this regard.” (Caryacarya -1, Livelihood of Women)

PRABHAT SAMGIITA

“Ba’hir vishve dhara’ da’o na’ko, marme lukiye tha’ko…” – P.S. 3857

Purport:

O’ Parama Purusa You are hiding in everyone’s heart – that is Your hinterland. Baba, You cannot be held in this external world; searching You outside is nothing but a waste of time. O’ my dear One, You always reside in the deep core of my heart. You remain eternally in that golden vessel deep inside my being.

Baba, O’ Divine Entity, You give shelter at Your lotus feet to one and all. Regardless of who is crying for You, and who is longing for You, or who is oblivious about You, You lovingly shower Your compassion on all. You never make any distinctions. Everyone is part of Your creation; You lovingly bring one and all under Your divine shelter. With Your infinite attraction and the resonance of Your flute, You call everyone close. You lovingly draw everyone close by the
pull of the heart. This is Your special call.

Baba, You are eternally present and always smiling in my heart. O’ my Dearmost, You are so gracious…

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