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21 Jun 2013

Baba

This entire posting is composed of 2 parts:
(2) Posting: Spirit Behind Ananda Marga’s Vivaha System;
(1) Prabhat Samgiita #886.

== SPIRIT BEHIND ANANDA MARGA’S VIVAHA SYSTEM ==

Namaskar,
To bring anyone on the path of dharma a proper environment is necessary and for that one human society is needed. Towards this end, Baba has taken numerous steps.

On the one hand He has involved deeply in repairing addressing and solving society’s ills. In this way And He has exposed and given the solutions to cure society from: religious dogmas, casteism, racism, communalism, sentiments, exploitation, untouchability, color, economic disparity, etc. Indeed Baba has addressed so many inequalities and injustices in the society.

Simultaneously Baba has infused one very positive feature for humanity – His revolutionary concept of society building: Which includes both the creation of WTs and the formation of revolutionary marriages.

Society building ensures a certain stability and dynamism as well as the love and compassion necessary for enabling people to grow in a healthy and proper way. So this is one key for developing one human society.

And indeed when that society is formed then there will be huge scope for people to grow in all sorts of ways and devote maximum time for spiritual pursuits and ultimately become one with Parama Purusa.

So society building has a special role.

REVOLUTIONARY MARRIAGES:

IDEAL TOOL FOR SOCIETY BUILDING

Revolutionary marriages (RM) are a special feature of our Ananda Marga way of life and come within the scope of the society building department of AMPS. Actually the main basis of marriage in Ananda Marga is society building.

In the past Lord Buddha also neglected this important social factor so he could not form the society properly. Lord Buddha’s teachings were deficient in this regard. And many religions also have not been able to create solid systems and ideals for marriage. The materialistic societies around the globe are also severely lacking on the point of marriage.

The tantric system of marriage is 7000 years old and holds a special meaning and practical presentation. We have seen this in our lives especially in DMC when Baba used to give blessings to marriage couples.

BABA’S MARRIAGE BLESSING

First the newly married couple would approach the dais and do sastaunga pranam to Baba. And then with both of their hands the couple would jointly offer a flower garland to Baba. Then Baba would then place His own hands around their hands and join them in holding the mala (flower garland).

Then Baba would graciously bless their marriage: “Be like Shiva and Parvati, go on doing your worldly duties along with your psychic and spiritual pursuits, be the assets of the entire civilisation, and by your service the whole society should be benefited.”

Baba also used to repeat the mantra ‘Shubamastu…’, meaning ‘May you be blessed’.

And then He would give the mala to the bride. To English speaking margiis Baba used to say, ‘little girl take this mala and keep it with you’. And when He spoke to margiis in Bengali or Hindi this was the translation: ‘mother keep this garland along with you’.

Hundreds of times during DMC we have witnessed how Baba used to give His marriage blessings. And always He would begin by saying, “Be like Shiva and Parvati…”

Here the special significance of ‘Be like Shiva and Parvati’ is that during Lord Shiva’s entire married life He took care of Parvati and watched over her physical, psychic, and spiritual development; and Parvati took care of Lord Shiva as well. Their marriage was ideal. It was not based on material satisfaction or gain, but rather a high ideal. It was starting point of building one human society.

NO SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY IN THE PAST

Prior to Lord Shiva’s advent society was not properly formed. One key reason for this was that there was not a proper system of marriage. Instead, most were involved in libertine type of relations – especially the males.

The ones who suffered most then were the children and their mothers, but especially the children. Basically males did not accept any responsibility. So the whole responsibility of the child’s physical, psychic, sentimental, and spiritual welfare rested upon the mother alone. And it was just not possible for a single mother to manage all aspects of raising and providing for the child. The condition of the baby and mother was terrible.

LORD SHIVA’S CONTRIBUTION

Then Lord Shiva took advent. For the first time in human history He graciously gave the system of marriage. And that marriage system was primarily for the welfare of the child. So that child could receive the requisite love and support to one day become a bonafide member of the civilized society.

In this same spirit, Baba has created the society building department in our Ananda Marga.

THE PRESENT SCENE:

WHAT IS HAPPENING IN MATERIALISTIC AREAS & IN OUR ANANDA MARGA

Unfortunately in today’s materialistic countries, the true spirit of society building is not followed. Wherever materialism reigns, children are not properly cared for rather they are a by-product.

That is why we often see that children are not able or allowed to live along with their mothers, or sleep and get love and affection from their mothers even in nighttime. This results for any number of reasons: The parents might be divorced and the mother may have to work 3 jobs, or the parents are grossly involved in their careers and ignore their children, or there are other reasons. Unfortunately this is the common fashion these days: Children are often ignored and neglected whereby the child feels alienated from their surroundings.

In our Ananda Marga society the situation is improving a lot, but in the true sense society building has not yet taken proper shape. If we look back over the history we will find innumerable examples how the letter and the spirit of Baba’s given marriage system has been compromised.

But I have deep faith that with firm determination we will reach to the goal which Baba has established.

MUST PROPERLY PRESENT THE POINT OF VIVAHA

Baba has graciously given various special teachings for building up a spirited & singular human society. Each point has its own unique aspects and beneficial results – including His divine teaching on ‘vivaha’.

However, certain publishers have defined vivaha in an ordinary and mundane way. Yet we know Baba’s grand guideline of vivaha is not common and ordinary, but extraordinary.

POINT SOCIETY TOWARDS A SPIRITUAL GOAL

Since the very beginning in 1955, Baba’s has graciously guided us to form one human society. Because the whole aim of the Ananda Marga mission is Atmamok’s’a’rtham’ jagaddhita’ya ca – ‘self-realisation and service to humanity.’ But without building up one human society this can never be achieved. So Baba has taken strong steps to form a single human society whereby people can move towards their spiritual goal.

NEVER DONE BEFORE

In the past neither Lord Shiva nor Lord Krsna could do this. They were engaged in other ways and could not manage the strong planning necessary to bring the entire humanity within one thread. But Baba has indeed taken up this great endeavour.

BABA’S DIVINE TEACHING OF VIVAHA

Baba’s following teaching makes this subject more clear.

(A) LORD SHIVA INTRODUCED THE IDEAL

OF THE MARRIAGE SYSTEM

“Prior to Shiva, there was no system of marriage in human society. And as there was no recognized marriage system, the matrilineal order was in vogue, because it was easy to identify the mothers. In the case of the fathers, it was impossible to identify them. Shiva, for the first time, introduced the system of marriage which has continued until this day. The Sanskrit word for marriage, viváha (derived vi – vah + ghaiṋ), literally means “to follow a particular system”. This system of marriage is known as Shaeva viváha. According to this system, the bride and the bridegroom will equally share full responsibility for their marriage, without any consideration of caste or community.” (1)

(B) BABA PRESENTS THE HISTORY OF THOSE EARLY HUMANS:

FROM LIBERTINE WAY OF LIFE TO MARITAL FAMILY SYSTEM

“At the beginning of evolution, humans used to lead libertine lives without any consideration for family obligations, but they gradually developed a family instinct. However, that family instinct was no different from that of the elephants, lions, pigeons, etc. Due to this inborn instinct, males and females arrived at a loose but workable compromise regarding family life. But in that there was no sense of responsibility born out of a developed conscience; rather, due to their loose relationships with each other, one person used to desert another and go anywhere he or she liked. The number of such libertines was very high, and they used to disturb the peace and harmony of the so-called family members and become the cause of many serious quarrels.”

“The male libertines would not take responsibility for their offspring. They used to wander freely, and as a result, the entire responsibility for raising the children in their infancy would devolve on the mothers. But it was not possible for the mothers alone to bear the responsibility of maintaining the children, as a result of which many children died in early infancy. Those who survived felt themselves to be in a sea of troubles after they were weaned from their mother’s breast-milk. Then they would be deprived of their mother’s love, since she had to take care of the next baby. Those were the days of the prehistoric humans…The life of the libertines was just like that of the animals.”

“Shiva made the rule that regardless of whether women were capable or incapable of earning a livelihood, men would have to take on the responsibility of supporting them; thus the Sanskrit word for “husband” is bharttá. The word bharttá is derived from the root verb bhr + suffix trń; the root bhr means “to support” and bharttá (in the first case-ending) means “one who supports someone”.”

“As a result of this arrangement, it became easier for the women to maintain the children, since they were relieved of the onerous responsibility of providing their food and clothing. Not only that, when the children became a bit older the direct responsibility for their maintenance shifted from the mother to the father.”

“It was not easy to know the fathers of children even in the case of the so-called householders, far less in that of the libertines. Children would know only their mothers. And after they were weaned, they would forget their mothers also. Thus being deprived of motherly love and affection at a very early age, they had no opportunity to develop the sweeter and finer sensibilities of the human mind. The human mind, the human intellect, was nipped in the bud; those people had no opportunity to blossom, to gladden the heart of the world with their sweet joy. By declaring the males to be bharttá [husbands] Shiva fulfilled a major portion of His task for human society.”

“But Shiva did more than that: He declared that women must be kalatra, which means that women must discharge their obligations to their husbands and their children in such a way that the latter will not have the least difficulty.”

“Those who accepted this new arrangement were declared married, and the other members of their society would be witnesses to the marriage ceremony, to bless the newly-married couple and pledge their cooperation to them. The Sanskrit equivalent for marriage is viváha (vi – vah + ghaiṋ): it means, after the ceremony, the man and woman can no longer live as libertines or as irresponsible so-called family people. They have to discharge their full obligations as bharttá and kalatra, responsible husband and responsible wife.” (2)

(C) VIVAH MEANS TO

LIVE LIFE IN A NEW WAY WITH A SPECIAL TYPE OF RESPONSIBILITY

“Vi – vah + ghaiṋ = viváha. The root verb vah means “to flow, to lead”. Viváha means “leading one’s life in a new way with a special type of responsibility” [in both Sanskrit and Bengali]. In the most correct Sanskrit, however, the word for “marriage” would be formed vi – úh. An alternative spelling is with u (not ú). Vyuh + kta = vyud́há (meaning “a married person”).”

“An unmarried person remains somewhat free from responsibilities. As a result they get the chance to discharge some greater duties outside their small family. Even though they go outside the house for other work, it is not against anyone’s interests. Vyud́há means a “married person who shoulders a greater family responsibility and begins a new style of life.””

“Hence, when an unmarried girl or boy gets married, his or her life begins to flow down a different channel. Various responsibilities devolve on them. They can no longer afford to take their responsibilities lightly.” (3)

Namaskar,
in Him
Diindayal

Note 1: MISTAKE MADE BY PUBLICATIONS DEPT:

OVER AND OVER AGAIN THEY WRONGLY DEFINE VIVAHA

So vivaha is one special way for developing the society; it is a revolutionary form of marriage that brings the fulfillment of human potential through responsibility, commitment and spiritual growth. Vivaha cannot merely be defined by a single mundane term, i.e. marriage. The Sanskrit word vivaha cannot merely be translated or defined as marriage. The ideal of vivaha is so much more than that. That is why Baba Himself takes several paragraphs to explain the meaning of vivaha. Baba never merely defines vivaha as marriage.

As we all know, nowadays marriage mostly means one mundane love marriage where males later divorce when their sensual desires get directed towards some younger female etc. A person might marry 2, or 3, or 4, or 5 times. That is the common way nowadays. And each time it is defined as marriage, but that is not at all what vivaha is all about.

Unfortunately if you search for a definition of vivaha in the note sections of various Ananda Marga books, you will find that certain members of the Publications Dept merely define vivaha as marriage. That means in certain specific sections like the glossary and the footnotes, the publishers themselves chose to define the ideal of vivaha as marriage:

For instance:

(a) In the book, “Sarkar’s Short Stories Part 1” – the publishers inserted a footnote in the story – “The Headmasters’ Contest”. Here is the entirety of that footnote: “Viváha is the Sanskrit word for marriage.” So they merely defined vivaha as marriage when in fact it is so much more than that. Remarkably, the publishers took special efforts to create a footnote for the term vivaha. In that situation they could have described vivaha in so many positive and practical ways according to Baba’s dharmic explanation. But instead they merely defined it as marriage. That is completely misleading to the reader and it undermines the ideal of vivaha.

It would have been far better if those in charge defined vivaha as ‘the special system of a dharmic marriages first introduced in Lord Shiva’s time’ or ‘a union between husband and wife based on fulfillment of an ideal’ etc. Any of these type of definitions would been much more appropriate. Because to only say ‘vivaha = marriage’ is very misleading.

(b) In the book, “The Awakening of Women”, the publishers inserted a glossary and in that glossary they merely defined vivaha as marriage. They wrote one word – that’s it. Here again the publishers created a special place to define and describe the term vivaha but they failed to use any of Baba’s dharmic tenets. Yet vivaha itself is such a key component for the upliftment of humanity and grants women and mothers an entirely new status. And in the book “The Awakening of Women” the publishers utterly neglected to put a proper definition of vivaha in the glossary. That undermines the very purpose of the book.

It would have been far better if those in charge referenced specific sections of Baba’s discourses and direct the reader to learn about vivaha in that manner. Or if they wanted a shorter definition for their glossary they could have defined vivaha as ‘the special system of a dharmic marriages first introduced in Lord Shiva’s time’ or ‘a union between husband and wife based on fulfillment of an ideal’ etc. Any of these type of definitions would been much more appropriate. Because to only say ‘vivaha = marriage’ is very misleading.

(c) The Ananda Marga Dictionary published in 2005 falls into this same problem. If you look up vivaha in the Ananda Marga Dictionary all you will find is the singular mundane term ‘marriage’– nothing more. By this way people will think that vivaha just means one mundane love marriage where males later divorce when their sensual desires get directed towards some younger female etc. It would have been far better if those in charge defined vivaha as ‘the special system of a dharmic marriages first introduced in Lord Shiva’s time’ or ‘a union between husband and wife based on fulfillment of an ideal’ etc. Any of these types of definitions would been much more appropriate. Because to only say ‘vivaha = marriage’ is very misleading.

Just imagine if in the dictionary someone defined dharma as ‘religion’ – without saying anything more. Then people would think dharma was just something dogmatic. How misleading and unjust that would be. Similarly to define vivaha using one simple mundane term like marriage is to do injustice to the ideal of vivaha because nowadays the marriage term is so commonly abused in as the divorce rate is 75% in some states and males regularly cheat on their wives, and vice-versa.

So in this materialistic era where the institution of marriage has nothing to do with the dharmic ideal of vivaha, the publishers of the Ananda Marga Dictionary must not define vivaha as ‘marriage’. The Dictionary definition must carry the inner spirit or dharmic quality of the term. Because Ananda Marga means dharma; so without that, the goal of making an Ananda Marga Dictionary remains unfulfilled, lacking, or faulty.

Note 2: NOT AN ISOLATED EXAMPLE – RATHER A PERVASIVE PROBLEM

The problems associated with the Ananda Marga Dictionary’s definition of vivaha do not exist in isolation. Verily there are dozens and dozens of terms – even hundreds – that are improperly defined in that Dictionary by those publishers. Unfortunately, many of the definitions do not reflect Baba’s given teachings of Ananda Marga. That is why the entire dictionary needs a critical review, not just one single definition.

Note 3: IDEA IS GOOD; PERFORMANCE WAS POOR

Overall, the idea of making an Ananda Marga dictionary is very good – if done properly. That means the dharmic definitions must be given according to the word and spirit of Ananda Marga ideology. Then surely it will be beneficial.

But when a Dictionary itself offers misleading, incomplete, and wrongful definitions, then that undermines the entire purpose of making a dictionary. Rather it is harmful. Best will be if stringent efforts are made to create a proper, well-referenced dictionary based purely on Ananda Marga ideals.

In conclusion, the term vivaha might also be defined in this way: A special union between a husband and a wife based on a dharmic ideal where both parties shoulder a great responsibility in raising a family while caring and watching for each others physical, mental, and spiritual development – plus we should always refer them to Baba’s discourses that offer a more explicit explanation.

REFERENCES
1. Namah Shivaya Shantaya, Disc: 2
2. Namah Shivaya Shantaya, Shivokti 3
3. Shabda Cayaniká Part 19

******** Prabhat Samgiita #886

“A’j toma’y pelum notun sa’je mor manoma’jhe…” (P.S. 886)

Purport:

O’ Parama Purusa, by Your causeless grace, today I have gotten You in a more loving way in my mind. You have come in a new form in my dhya’na. It is Your grace. Earlier my mind was busy and involved in a variety of works – both positive and negative. But now there are no such distractions. My mind is one-pointed and only ensconced in Your love.

O’ Divine Entity, the path that I was moving on was a zig-zag path. There was no hope or relief. My life was covered in darkness, day and night. By the attraction of Your divine love I looked towards You. O’ my dearmost, my most loving One, by Your grace the wheel of my chariot has just turned. In my dead river, a flood of sparkling fresh water has come. Baba, now my life has become effulgent.

O’ Parama Pursusa Baba, in the past there was black darkness and after that it was even more black. The whole atmosphere was totally bleak; my whole life was shrouded in darkness. Baba, You are so gracious, You have come with Your divine effulgence. You have come with more and more divine effulgence. O’ my Lord, now in whichever direction I look, it feels very blissful and loving. I feel Your divine presence in my heart and all around me. Baba, You have stolen my mind and made my heart full. My heart has become full with Your love.

Baba, today You have blessed me by coming to me in a more intimate and loving way. You are so gracious. Baba, I love You…

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Baba

PS Intro: This following Prabhat Samgiita can be understood in two distinct ways:

(1) Baba is depicting the advent of Parama Purusa as Mahasambhuti in the play of His divine liila; and,
(2) this song refers to Baba’s divine appearance in dhyana.

“Na’m na’-ja’na’ ma’na’ na’-ma’na’ rauniin parii ese pa’she…” (P.S. 2983)

Purport:

One shining, colorful angel of unknown name came close to me. This angel was not concerned about getting respect or not. Just it graciously came to me. Its eyes were glowing with golden effulgence, and this divine angel told something to me.

The angel said: ‘My abode is in the divine world yet to accomplish the work & for the welfare of all, I move around this entire universe. All those who love me, I pull them close.’

‘Without stopping I move continuously around this entire universe.’ The angel furthermore told, ‘In the bond of love, I also get caught. I float in the flow of divine songs.’

From the divine world one angel has come and graced me, and told me all the secrets of its advent…

Note: In this song Baba is using the allegory of an angel, yet in true sense He is talking about Himself. Thus, although the word – parii – literally means ‘angel’, but in Prabhat Samgiita the real meaning of the term parii is: Baba the Parama Purusa.

== STORY: BABA’S HUMOUR ==

Namaskar,
In His divine manner, Baba made everyone laugh at this DMC (Dharma Maha Cakra) with His humourous comment.

HERE IS THE SCENE

It was May 1983 in Ananda Nagar and general darshan was going on.
The Prabhat Samgiita was sung. It was song #58, Dujane jakhan miliche takhan, which is a song about marriage. As per the custom, after the song was sung, then in Baba’s presence, selected Dadas read their purports.

The basic idea of the song is:

O’ human beings, when two people are being united in marriage, then you all shower them with your good wishes. Amidst their burning sorrows, amidst their garlands of joy, in their pains and pleasures, be with them always.

Our human society is indivisible, neglecting not a single family. Let us all sing and dance together. Accept everyone as your own.

With the sweet music of the earth, give this newly married couple your affectionate words and wishes. Give them sweet messages of love. Fill their lives with colour and shower them with your well wishing…

HERE COMES BABA’S HUMOROUS COMMENT

As everyone may recall, it was quite normal for Baba to add and correct the purports read by various Dadas. This day was no different.

When the Dada finished reading His Hindi purport, Baba started reciting this Sanskrit shloka about marriage.

Kanya’ varayate ru’pam, ma’ta’ vittam, pita’ shruti,
Ba’ndhavaha hitam icchanti, mis’t’a’nnam itare jana’h

While smiling, Baba then gave the following explanation:

At the time of marriage, the bride longs for a handsome groom; the mother hopes that the bride and groom become wealthy; the father hopes the groom is a talented and smart husband for his daughter; the friends desire that in spite of all of life’s difficulties the newlyweds should be happy; and others in attendance hope that whatever may be, there should be the distribution of sweets.

With His wide smile, and looking across the pandal from left to right, He said: “I belong to the last group!”

Hearing this, everyone started laughing.

REFLECTION ON ABOVE STORY

By His divine example, Baba is demonstrating that there should be a very sweet and cordial relation when teaching others. As the ideal Guru, and Supreme teacher, Baba always maintained a familial and loving relationship with His disciples, where there was always a perfect symmetry between discipline and humour.

As Ananda Margiis, when guiding others it is our duty to create this same balance. When we teach others we should emulate Baba’s appraoch. We should not be too strict where there is no time for laughter. That will not achieve the desired result. Through the use of humour, talented teachers hold the interest of their students. Laughter helps bring the wandering mind back onto the topic with greater focus.

Those who fail to use any humour in their teaching style are poor teachers. Indeed, we have all seen how some professors remain aloof when they are teaching; that makes for a very poor relationship with students. In contrast, some teachers are too casual and relaxed in their teaching style. That also is not good because when the time comes to impose discipline, they cannot do it.
Between the teacher and student, there should be a proper balance between discipline and humour. That is Baba’s teaching.

Finally, the above story is not an uncommon occasion. In every discourse and darshan, Baba would lovingly create the situation where everyone would laugh and feel joyous. This was part and parcel of His beautiful and effecive teaching style. By this way, all bhaktas kept focused on the topic and enjoyed Baba’s darshan.

BABA’S SPECIAL MANNER

Being a Parama Purusa, Taraka Brahma and Sadguru, Baba was very humorous and loving. Irrespective of anyone’s economic or social standing, all margiis felt close to Him. By this way they came closedevotionally as well. Between God and His devotees there should not be any distance or complex. Every margii felt Baba to be their own, by His grace.

During His each and every discourse, Baba used to create certain situations wherein everyone would laugh.

“Laughter gives happiness.” (Yoga Psychology)

Namaskar,
in Him,
Surya

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To: am-global@earthlink.net
Subject: Baba Story: When My Wife Became Enemy
From: Ananda Mayii
Date: Sun, 17 Mar 2013 22:36:04

Baba

This entire email is composed of 3 parts:
(1) Posting: Baba Story: When My Wife Became Enemy
(2) Trailer Quote: Samaj Is Based on Neo-Humanism – Not Groupism
(3) Prabhat Samgiita: #3982

Each section is demarcated by asterisks (***).

== BABA STORY: WHEN MY WIFE BECAME ENEMY ==

Namaskar,
The year was 1967. While taking initiation, Shrii Somnath Upadhayay gave up his sacred thread and sacred hair that was indicative of his birth into a so-called brahmin family. At the time, Somnathji was working as a bank cashier and leading a relatively normal life.

Seeing this, all his relations were very upset and frustrated with him. They thought he had joined one Muslim sect etc. In particular, his wife was very unhappy with what had transpired. She was not at all pleased by seeing her husband renounce those Hindu rituals, i.e. sacred thread and sacred hair.

Not only that, but so many changes were going on – he had adopted a sentient diet and there were other lifestyle modifications.

HIS WIFE IS MOST UPSET

His wife was sad and became fearful that he would leave the house entirely. She confronted him directly about this and demanded, “Do not do sadhana, you are going to leave me and become a monk. I want that you should go back to your old ways of living.”

She was becoming a big obstacle and creating terrible problems for him.

Somnathji tried to reassure and convince his wife that everything was alright. But to no avail.

When he sat for sadhana, then she would bang a metal plate near his ear by striking the plate with a big metal spoon. Not only that, She did all sorts of harassment to interrupt and stop his sadhana. But Somnathji did not want to leave his sadhana.

That only made his wife more intent on running his meditation practice.

To not rile her and invite her anger, Somnathji began doing his sadhana in his personal room so that his wife would not see him. But that did not stop her. Instead, she would just bang loudly on the door. Plus she would do other things to disturb harass him at the time of sadhana.

Even then it did not end there. Sometimes she would intentionally add too much salt to his food and make life difficult for him in other ways. Somnathji tried various methods to convince his wife – but nothing worked. She remained upset and was crying all day long.

SOMNATHJI APPEALS TO FAMILY ACARYAS FOR HELP

Finally, Somnathji asked local family acaryas to come and speak with her one-on-one. Somnathji wanted them to come and reassure her that everything was alright.

So family acaryas like Ac. Devi Chand Sharma ji, Ac. Kedar Sharma ji, and Ac Ksitij ji each came. They tried hard to convince her and fix this problem. They told her that her husband was involved in dharmic practices and that he will not leave her and become a sannyasi. They patiently explained to her that sadhana is not bad. They tried to reassure her and inspire her in various ways.

But his wife She yelled and screamed at them. She was very frustrated with what they were saying and abused and threatened them: “You are a liar, you took away my husband. He used to eat onion and garlic, but now no more. He left Hinduism and is doing all kinds of things in his room!” Their visits did nothing to diminish her fears. Indeed, she was so feisty and abusive that nobody wanted to go again and try to convince her.

THINGS GET EVEN WORSE

Just when it seemed like it had hit rock bottom – she would do something even more extreme.

Their house was on a road that margiis would travel and she would cry out and say, “You stole my husband and ruined my family.”

Everyone in Ananda Marga was shocked by her dealing and nobody wanted to go and convince her that everything was alright. Upon seeing anyone from Ananda Marga, she would just become more irate and volatile.

The situation become more extreme: She stopped cooking food for herself and her husband. She refrained from eating anything and told him to leave Ananda Marga. Not only that, she stopped breast-feeding their very young infant. The whole situation was becoming worse and still more worse.

Finally, Somnathji thought, “Only You Baba can save this situation. My wife stopped taking food this morning; she is going to become ill and die; and my newly-born child is also not being fed and will surely die. No one around here can help; all attempts have failed. Being the Omniscient Entity, You now all this so I am not going to tell you in person. You know my thoughts. Only You can save the situation. Without that my whole life will be hellish. No acarya can solve this matter. Baba, the situation is so extreme; this is beyond what anyone can do. Only, You can solve this matter.”

BABA ARRIVES IN RANCH TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM

Those were the thoughts of Somnathji one morning, and that very afternoon, Baba made a surprise visit to Ranchi. Upon His arrival at Devi Chand’s house, Baba, the all-knowing Parama Purusa, told that Somnath was facing a big problem that needed to be resolved. Baba furthermore gave Devi Chand the instruction to bring Somnath’s wife to the ashram.

Devi Chand conveyed Baba’s guideline to all concerned family acaryas and margiis etc. They all felt that indeed something should done. All felt an inner duty to follow Guru’s order, but no one wanted to go and face the wrath of Somnath’s wife. That was the predicament. They were all afraid of her abusive manner.

So they collectively discussed what should be done and they decided that they should all go together en mass to visit Somnath’s wife. After the 1 or 2 kilometer journey, they reached her house and found that she was no longer so furious. They invited her to come to the ashram and see Baba. Amazingly, she did not abuse them, rather she contemplated the matter and decided that she would go.

BABA SHOWERS HIS GRACE

She went to the Ranchi jagrti and by Baba’s grace her entire mind-set was transformed. She saw so many people: Females, children etc. She was very happy with their demeanor and dealing, and she asked how she could become a margii. All were astonished to see the change and encouraged her to learn sadhana.

Baba was there conducting Personal Contact (PC) and she was very curious. So she attended general darshan and just by being there in His Presence, all her doubts and concerns melted. She thought how all have come for Baba. She was interested to learn sadhana and ultimately became a very good and active margii.

Over time, she told her story to others and asked new people to keep an open-mind when first coming in contact with Ananda Marga.

THREE TEACHINGS FROM THIS STORY

1. When any devotee is in problem then Guru is also affected. He cannot remain indifferent or apathetic. That is why Baba rushed to Ranchi and asked others to bring Somnath’s wife to the ashram. Baba changed her mind and she became cooperative and turned into a bonafide margii. Baba changed her mind and resolved Somnath’s problem. It is His grace.

2. When new people see many margiis they feel they are part of something big and their concerns and frustrations are eased. They get a psychic boost. That is why it is important to bring new people and even so-so margiis to big programs where they will get inspired and become active.

3. It is the duty and dharma of every Ananda Margii to fight against obstacles. On the path of dharma, there will always be difficulties and hurdles. By overcoming such obstacles, we proceed onwards towards the Goal. Thus, obstacles are helping forces on the spiritual journey. To shirk such obstacles is to lose the path and invite degeneration. To overcome all obstacles establishes the aspirant on the path of sadhana.

Here following are Baba’s teaching related with this topic.

“IF OBSTACLES DO NOT BLOCK YOUR PATH,

IT MEANS YOU ARE ONLY INDULGING IN TALL TALK”

“The psychic inertness which I term dogma will seek to thwart your progress with all its might; this is quite natural. One should not be fearful and stop moving due to this dogma. It should be borne in mind that forward movement always implies facing obstacles created by inertness. It would be unnatural if obstacles did not come. If obstacles do not block your path, it means you are only indulging in tall talk, you are not actually trying to move forward. We often hear people saying, “I just commenced a project and such-and-such person opposed me”. This is quite natural. If you want to do something concrete, inertness in various forms and various ways will stand in your path. You will have to welcome these obstacles with a smile and say, “Hello obstacles, you have come. You do your duty and let me do mine.” In Ananda Sútram it has been said, Bádhá sá yuśamáná shaktih sevyam’ sthápayati lakśye “Obstacles are the helping forces which establish people in their cherished goal.”” (1)

“IGNORANCE OF THE INDIVIDUAL MIND”

“The greatest obstacle to the collective progress of the human race is the ignorance of the individual mind. Knowledge is for all – it should be available to all and free like the light and air.” (2)

“Obstacles in fact are no foes on the path of sádhaná [spiritual practice], but indeed friends. They only do service to a person. It is on account of these obstacles that the battle rages against them, and this counter-effort alone carries the sádhaka [spiritual aspirant] to his or her cherished goal.” (3)

“THEY ARE NOT CONFIDENT OF THEIR ABILITIES”

“The madhyama category of people are those who undertake some work but throw up their hands when any problem crops up. They presume that any obstacle that comes in their way is a Himalayan obstacle, and hence they give up their work. They think they will not be able to tackle the problems they face. They are not confident of their abilities.”
“The uttama category of people are those who take up a task and are determined to fulfil it. They go on struggling against all odds till they achieve their goal. No problem can defy solution. No difficulty can be greater than their capacity to solve it. They go on fighting against all obstacles. They can face any challenge and meet any predicament. They are determined to achieve their objective, come what may.” (4)

“THE NOBLER THE TASK, THE MIGHTIER THE OBSTACLE”

“The entire humanity must be looked upon as one integrated existence – and move collectively towards the all-round perfection of human life. All actions are bound to confront obstacles. It has to be borne in mind that the nobler the task, the mightier the obstacle. For human emancipation, there is no other way but to march ahead crushing the towering peaks of obstacles with a benevolent intellect and collective endeavour.”
‘Hence I reiterate, go ahead with courage and unity. You have to move on ensuring real justice to all individuals and all geographical people.” (5)

“ONLY WAY TO OVERCOME AVIDYÁMÁYÁ”

“Intuitional practice, as taught by a great preceptor, is the healing balm; it is with this that one can drive away Avidyámáyá and gain emancipation. As the influence of Avidyámáyá decreases, the temptations and troubles of the world cease to be an obstacle to intuitional practice. As this is the only way to overcome Avidyámáyá, it can easily be practised within worldly life. Avidyámáyá will disturb a person in the beginning, but once defeated, it will not be able to create any hindrance to the pursuit of intuitional practice.” (6)

“THEY ARE BOUND TO BE DESTROYED”

“Whatever humans do in consonance with the dictates of dharma will ensure their well-being, their victory, their prosperity. And whoever goes against these ingrained human characteristics, against these dharma-orientated characteristics, will be doomed to destruction. For human beings, ideation on Parama Puruśa is a dharmic injunction. By divine decree everyone has the right to live in the world with dignity. If anyone creates any obstacle against this dharma-oriented system, if they oppose it, they are bound to be destroyed.” (7)

Namaskar,
at His lotus feet,
Ananda Mayii

References:
1. A Few Problems Solved – 5, Shrávańii Púrńimá
2. A Few Problems Solved – 1, The Practice of Art and Literature
3. Ananda Sutram, Chapter 3
4. Ananda Vacanamrtam – 1, The Best Category of Persons
5. Ananda Vanii #56
6. Ananda Marga Elementary Philosophy, Why Are People Afraid of Intuitional Practice?
7. Ananda Vacanamrtam – 4, Opposition to Dharma Will Certainly Invite Destruction

The section below demarcated by asterisks is an entirely different topic,
completely unrelated to the above material. It stands on its own as a point of interest.

*************************************
Samaj is Based on Neo-Humanism, not Groupism

“If each samaj [socio-economic unit] is inspired by a comprehensive ideology and a universal outlook, human society will move ahead with accelerating speed towards a sublime ideal.” (Prout in a Nutshell – 13, p. 23)

Note: Nowadays some leaders are singing the song of samaj as they try to forge ahead with their narrow-minded agendas. They justify their groupism by claiming it as a samaj movement. But margiis understand Baba’s teachings and recognise the truth. Our samaj system is based on universal principles not factional allegiances. Thus the groupism carried out by certain, so-called NIA Dadas and the ideal of our samaj movements are worlds apart.
*************************************

******* Here Starts the Prabhat Samgiita *******

“Toma’y khunje khunje priyo, din je ket’e ja’y…” (P.S. 3982)

Purport:

Baba, my most adorable One, with deep longing in search of You my days are passing in vain. In the absence of getting You, my whole life is gradually getting wasted. O’ my Dearmost, where have I not looked for You. I have wandered around and searched in the seven oceans, on the mountain peaks, as well as on the earth, and also in the caves – in every nook and corner of this world, but alas I could not get You.

Baba, day and night, secretly I also searched You in the flower garden and in various holy lands and tiirthas – all done in hopes of getting a glance at You. Baba, I searched everywhere with the hope that one day I will find You. But, in the end, all my efforts were for naught.

Baba, with deep longing in my heart, I have also searched You in the galaxies, meteors, nebulae, and in the stars – all around & everywhere. Also, I searched for You in the dark, black-coloured clouds on the rainy days, in the scorching heat of the summer season, as well as in the shade of the tree in springtime. Baba, I have searched for You with a deep yearning and longing in my heart; I have looked for You everywhere.

Baba, O’ my Dearmost, on one colourful golden dawn saturated in the effulgence & aroma of a newly blossoming flower, You took advent in my heart. Your grand arrival came after a long, deep, dark, & painful night of searching for You. Alas, in the end, You graced me by coming in my mind. Baba, You are so gracious…

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From: Kiran
Date: Thu, 21 Feb 2013 21:53:58
Subject: Why Some Marriages Fail in AM
To: am-global@earthlink.net

Baba

This entire email is composed of 3 parts:
(1) Prabhat Samgiita #2429;
(2) Posting: Why Some Marriages Fail in AM;
(3) Trailer Quote: Structural Defects May Be The Cause
Each section is demarcated by asterisks (*).

**** Here begins the Prabhat Samgiita ****

Note: This Prabhat Samgiita is opening the window for how life society will be after the establishment of neo-humanism.

“Sakal duya’r khule dile prabhu, Va’ta’yan-pathe a’lo elo…” (P.S. 2429)

Purport:

O’ Parama Purusa, O’ Baba, You are so gracious; You have come and opened all the doors and windows, and inundated this world with Your divine effulgence. O’ Baba, You are so gracious; You have taken advent and given the divine teaching of neo-humanism and Your universal philosophy. By this way, You have eradicated all dogma and narrow-mindedness. On the eastern horizon the crimson dawn is visible. The darkness has been dispelled. There is a brilliant new era on the rise. The statictiy of narrow-mindedness and misunderstanding is vanishing, by the propagation of Your neo-humanistic philosophy.

O’ Divine Entity, in the past there was the domination of dogma and groupism all around. Countless superstitions, rituals and dogmas were doing their naked dance. In the past there was a lot of division and narrow-minded people had the upper-hand. Now the era has changed.

Now, with the presence of Your divine effulgence, in the blink of an eye those creatures of darkness along with their dogmas dissolved into thin air. With the arrival of Ananda Marga philosophy and neo-humanism, the demons cannot spread their venom anymore – they have all been destroyed. O’ the Embodiment of effulgence and shelter of all, with Your affection and punishment, scorching heat and cool shade, Your love is vibrant. Irrespective in all these situations – good or bad – tough times or good times – Your grace emanates in various ways. You are always present with Your mood of causeless grace. O’ Parama Purusa, You have only one motive – to help jiivas. In Your divine liila, You create all kinds of events – good and bad – yet everywhere Your well-wishing is present. There is no other motive than the welfare of all. Baba, Your grace is always flowing and showering bliss…

== WHY SOME MARRIAGES FAIL IN AM ==

Namaskar,
Here are more points which I think will be helpful for understanding this entire issue of failed marriages.

BEWARE OF INTEREST GROUPS

1) One should be prudent – even skeptical, about receiving advice from stakeholders – ie sometimes even family margiis also carry a bias. For instance, let’s say that in their unit or bhukti, there is a girl or boy nearing 30 years of age and it is obvious that this person needs to get married soon. Then with the intention of supporting them, such people falsely praise that boy or girl up to the sky in order to attract an interested party. Under the notion of helping to marry that older boy or girl, some such people may say things that are not true. Out of sympathy they may say, “Oh he or she is very good and has always been exemplary in our community.” When in fact that is not at all true. Just they are saying like that in order to get that person married. Actually they want to help but what they are doing is not at all good. Encouraging false perceptions as will lead to a bad marriage – or the marriage may simply implode or break apart.

FINANCE

2) Finances play a big role in any household. So the boy and girl should have in-depth discussions and get to know each other’s lifestyle and views on money. Someone who wishes to live like a king or queen should not marry someone with a sadhu mentality, or vice-versa. There should be clarity on all financial matters including credit, debt, cash allowances etc. The expectations on points of finance should be very clear.

CHILDREN & EDUCATION

3) One of the most defining points of any marriage is child rearing. Ahead of time – before they marry – the boy and girl should discuss how they are going to raise their children. What values will they impose? How far will they goad their child into Ananda Marga way of life? How far will they go to never compromise with dogma? The child must be brought to the path of sadhana at any early age and encouraged in this practice wholeheartedly.

Is one going to let the child play always while the other parent tries to instill a sense of discipline toward spiritual life? Is one going to let the child eat garlic while the other wishes to raise the child on a sentient diet. There are so many points of possible contention.

One must also remember that those children will one day be teenagers. Will you raise a person who will be a slave of pseudo-culture. If so, that teenager may bring meat into your kitchen, alcohol into your study, and harsh, loud music into your sadhana room. If one parent emphasizes spiritual life and the other does not, there are going to be problems – many of them.

So this should be thoroughly discusses beforehand, lest you become a stranger in your own house where your own children have become like non-margiis. In that case, they and your spouse will form a majority vote in your own home. If you do not educate them about our AM way of life from their infancy, this is going to happen.

POINT OF AWARENESS

4) If the groom follows the Indian tradition that females should cook and do all sorts of house chores – if this is his preconceived notion – then it should be be discussed ahead of time.

Here I don’t want to debate the which role is proper or improper for the male and female in a marriage, only this is brought as a point of awareness and that discussion ahead of time is helpful.

Otherwise this might be the cause of a marriage break-up.

NATURE OF TRANSITORY WORLD

5) Here is another critical point that the boy and girl must review. They both must be educated about, as well as discuss, how this world is transitory. The beauty they both possess today will not last forever. At any time, they may lose much of that beauty. One might contract some terrible disease like diabetes or multiple sclerosis, or get involved in a road accident etc. So many things can happen. The boy and girl should be told about how this world is transitory; they must understand the impact of this. If anyone gets married based on external beauty that marriage will fall apart. We have seen this so many times. They should discuss with one another how they will treat and regard each other when they are sick, disabled or helpless. Because, after all, their youthfulness and beauty will not last forever. Hearing and seeing this, do they still want to get married.

ANANDA MARGA IDEOLOGY

6) The teachings of Ananda Marga have to be a central aspect of any margii marriage. Both boy and girl have to be of the mind-set that what Baba says on any given topic is the defining opinion.

It is not enough to renounce one’s caste and get married. Yes, we have to overcome all caste sentiments etc, but our Ananda Marga ideology encompasses all realms of existence.

Both have to be ready to follow Baba in each and every aspect of life. So when there is any disagreement between the husband and spouse, then the answer must be found in Baba’s guideline. And that must be accepted by both as final. This must be discussed ahead of time.

OATH

7) The boy and the girl should be ready to strictly follow the oath of our Ananda Marga marriage: To live like Shiva and Parvatii. This should be formally written down and both the boy and girl should be educated as to what that means and then sign that piece of paper as a veritable contract. This contract must be binding on each and every Ananda Marga marriage. One must be extremely careful and aware if their spouse will Ananda Marga way of life or not.

DO NOT RELY ON WTS FOR MATCH-MAKING

8) It is important to remember that Dadas must NOT act as a mediator for any Ananda Marga marriage. Invariably, Dadas will give preference to the family giving them more money. So if the boy is not interested in AM and drowned in pseudo-culture, that Dada will paint a false picture and say how the boy is spirited and meticulous in 16 pts. This may not happen every time – but certainly there is scope for such issues. It has happened in the past and must be avoided in the future. And the best way to avoid this in the future is not to involve Dadas.

Besides it is not good for our wholetimers to act as matchmakers. In that process some accidentally get themselves matched up and they leave their Wt ship. This also has happened.

Thus for everyone’s well being, no Wt should be actively involved in match-making. Rather Wts should refrain from match-making entirely. That is Baba’s rule.

TREMENDOUS BENEFIT

By making all of the above perfectly clear between the boy and girl before marriage, then so many misnomers, false perceptions, and bogus expectations will be washed away. The mind will be clear and pointed and one can truly decide whether to marry that person or not. Or should they marry someone else. This will have tremendous benefit in both the personal lives of those who wed as well as in the greater society. People will be successful and productive in their marriages and society will not be plagued by mis-matched marriages and divorce. Mis-matched marriages are commonly looked upon as normal to others, but those involved in that marriage suffer internally and feel like an alien in their own house. Children will not be left shelterless but rather empowered by having dedicated parents who live by a spiritual ideal. Then society can truly be done in the real spirit of the term.

POSITIVE OUTCOME

Some may complain that after reading this now no one will want to get married. They will argue that there are to many stipulations and it is an impossible endeavor. But theirs is not a well-reasoned approach.

We have to remember that when drugs were initially given as medicine then the side effects were never listed and patients were getting harmed. Finally the government intervened and demanded that all medical side effects must be stated. After this judgment, some were concerned that no one will take those medicines if companies are forced to list the side effects. Yet here we are years and decades later, and people still take those medicines and they are aware about the side effects so they can protect themselves. The end result is positive.

Similarly, if people are aware ahead of time about the difficulties of married life, they will be better off. Then they can properly prepare for getting married and select the right spouse and create an ideal family.

Finally, the main idea is that the entire institution of marriage cannot be stopped. It has been going on for thousands of years. It satisfies a basic human need. Thus listing the pitfalls of marriage is not going to deter anyone from getting married. Only it will fortify them with the requisite knowledge to make an educated decision.

NEGATIVE INFLUENCE

After all, we are living in a materialistic society, so what is going on all around affects us. Not only that, we live in world that is dominated by gross materialism where “love” marriages are the norm. Two people get attracted – give in to sensual desires – and then divorce when any problem comes or difficulty arises. Or they leave one another when their become infatuated with someone else.

We must not allow this disease to affect our Ananda Marga way of life. Rather we are to positively affect the greater society.

RESULT OF MIS-MATCHED MARRIAGE

Here Baba graphically points out the fate of those who suffer from mismatched marriages.

Baba says, “The spouse of a certain gentleman that I knew was quite ill-mannered. One winter evening I saw this gentleman sitting quietly at the foot of a tree. I asked him: “Why are you sitting under this tree on a winter evening? You’ll freeze.” He replied: “You know, my young friend, if I go in the house I’ll hear only khankhan jhanhan [unpleasant and disturbing sounds]. It’s a lot more peaceful out here.” (1)

VIVAHA

Baba has graciously given the perfect system for building a great human society. Marriage is one of the key elements. Every marriage within the Marga should be done only after thoughtful consideration. All should be very aware of what marriage means and they should know who they are marrying.

Baba says, “[Shiva] declared that women must be kalatra, which means that women must discharge their obligations to their husbands and their children in such a way that the latter will not have the least difficulty. Those who accepted this new arrangement were declared married…The Sanskrit equivalent for marriage is viváha (vi – vaha + ghaiṋ): it means, after the ceremony, the man and women can no longer live as libertines or as irresponsible so-called family people. They have to discharge their full obligations as bharttá and kalatra, responsible husband and responsible spouse…The liberal meaning of the term viváha is “live one’s life in a new way with a special type of responsibility.” This is the underlying significance of the Shaeva system of marriage.” (2)

Namaskar,
In Him,
Kiran

REFERENCES:
1. Varna Vijiana, Disc: 19
2. Namah Shivaya Shantaya, Disc: 9. Shivokti 3

Note LINK TO SIMILAR TOPIC:

Here is a link to an earlier letter on this issue

http://am-global-01.blogspot.com/2013/02/story-of-broken-marriage-infighting.html

The section below demarcated by asterisks is an entirely different topic,
completely unrelated to the above letter. It stands on its own as a point of interest.
**************************************
Structural Defects May Be The Cause

There are all kinds of reasons why people may succumb to dogma. It may happen due to self-interest, cowardly nature, political gain etc. And here Baba points out how it may be due to defects in their physical structure. That may be why they cannot follow Baba.

Baba says, “If there is under-secretion of the hormones of the testes glands, a youth will develop less kindness, and less hair will grow in the armpits and pubic region. If you see a man with these physical characteristics, then and there you can come to a conclusion about the extent of his kindness. Moreover, such a person will most likely support dogma. He will not have the moral strength to protest against dogma (including scriptural dogma), and he will not support a new idea.” (Yoga Psychology)
**************************************

Read Full Post »

From: Vikram
Subject: Story Of Broken Marriage, Infighting, & Kicking Each Other
Date: Tue, 19 Feb 2013 20:23:58
To: am-global@earthlink.net

Baba

This entire email is composed of 3 parts:
(1) Prabhat Samgiita #2180;
(2) Posting: Story Of Broken Marriage, Infighting, & Kicking Each Other;
(3) Trailer Quote: In Ananda Marga Guru Puja is one Lesson
Each section is demarcated by asterisks (*).

**** Here begins the Prabhat Samgiita ****
Baba

“Tava path dhare, tava na’m kare, toma’r pa’nei cale tha’ki…” (P.S. 2180)

Purport:

O’ Parama Purusa, by Your grace I am treading on Your path – singing Your name and moving towards You. You are my Desideratum. O’ my Dearmost, I am moving closer and closer towards You – to reach You. Baba, except You, in this universe who else is mine – no one. For this reason, I am always calling Your name in my dhyana sadhana, seeking Your shelter.

O’ Lord, in this beautified universe of Yours, You have provided me a special place according to Your liking and plan. You have graciously bestowed everything upon me; You have given me everything; and, You did not desire anything from me in return. O’ my Lord, You go on pouring Your divine grace eternally. But I alone indulged in procrastination. All demerits such as lethargy come from my side. I created all kinds of lame excuses as justification. Baba, all the lacuna belong to me; whereas, You Yourself are ever-gracious.

O’ Divine Entity, in the lonely corner of Your vast Cosmic Mind, my unit mind resides. From that corner, my mind vibrates. From those vibrations, in sweet resonance, the lotus of love opens its eyes with devotion and love. That lotus has blossomed in my heart and is looking towards You with deep yearning.

Baba, singing Your Name, I am moving on Your path. For me, Your grace is everything…

== STORY OF BROKEN MARRIAGE, INFIGHTING, & KICKING EACH OTHER ==

Namaskar,
Recently, on one rainy dark lunar midnight, a dear friend of mine came to my house in that pitch darkness and knocked on the door. I was surprised he had come but after hearing his voice I brought him inside.

He was visibly shaken – nervous, upset, and worried. We talked at length. I found out that his spouse had beat him. She returned from a friend’s wedding reception where she ate some tamasik food. It was quite apparent as onion small was emanating from her mouth. The husband objected. Then they started quarreling. Ultimately he overreacted and verbally accosted her. In his fury he called her nasty names. In turn, she hit him & beat him. He ran away to save his own life. Don’t be surprised. But she was a certified karate teacher.

For reasons of privacy we shall refer to the husband as Prakash and the spouse as Renu.

Prakash and I talked for hours that night. I calmed him down. Though I was shocked & surprised to hear since the inception of their marriage they have been quarreling on multiple issues.

This was very astonishing to me because I always thought of theirs as an ideal marriage. I did not realise what was going on behind the scenes. All along I had been telling everyone that their marriage was successful. But now look what happened.

Just to give you a little background, Prakash and Renu were married at DMS – it happened quickly and was nearly forced on them. I also found out that Renu’s father gave Dadas a “contribution” of RS 50,000 to arrange the marriage and perform the ceremony. In this way Prakash was bound. In addition, those Dadas praised Renu. But although her parents are good margiis it became clear that Renu herself wanted nothing to do with Ananda Marga.

Before this, it was known that she would eat tamasik food: onion, garlic, meat & eggs when she was with her friends in town. She would eat those things outside the house – never bringing it into her own kitchen.

Anyway, that night when Prakash reached to my house, I clearly understood that they were living in hell. Externally it looked exemplary – but the reality was something quite different.

By this whole story my mind was blown away.

I tried to communicate with other margiis – near and far – about such matters and found that similar things were going on in many cases, but not most. I synthesized all the info and present these points to you to help ensure that such episodes do not happen again & again. Before the boy and girl even marry, something needs to be done to ensure that a mismatched marriage is averted in the future.

OVERVIEW

Marriage is such an important aspect of our Ananda Marga way of life. Family life plays a critical role on many societal levels so it is important that our Ananda Marga marriages be healthy, vibrant and strong.

However, in our Marga cases do arise where the marriage does not go well. In the case of Prakash and Renu – although they belonged to margiis families and their parents were strong margiis – but as a married couple they did not match. They had different life goals. If they knew this ahead of time they would not have married one another. They married because their parents were margiis, not because they had a shared life vision. They hardly knew each other and Dadas and others were just painting a rosy picture by talking only positives. No one talked about the negative side. If they had known more about each other they would not have married.

This letter contains key guidelines and recommendations for ensuring two people in Ananda Marga have the best opportunity for a proper marriage. Everyone, especially parents and those seeking to get married, should be aware of these following points.

ANANDA MARGA:

MARRIAGE IS FOR SOCIETY BUILDING

As we all know – first and foremost – our Ananda Marga marriage system is purely for society building. Ananda Marga marriages are for creating a healthy, safe, and inspired environment for raising children in a conscientious manner. The married couple should be confident and ready to contribute to the all around growth of society: individually & collectively, locally & globally etc. Marriage in Ananda Marga means commitment to one another and strict adherence to AM ideals. It is a unique system; this type of universal outlook is not formed in any other marriage system. They must build a proper unit family and embrace the greater universal family. This is our ideal.

It is in no way related with Hindu ritualistic marriages, western materialistic marriages, or any other “marriage system” from around the world. Nor do we follow or appreciate the new western model of “co-habitating” without marriage and living as a libertine. In all such cases, marriages are either based on external beauty, infatuation, money, post or social status, local or religious dogmas. These are the main allurements and aims most of the time.

POINTS EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW

The following are points all should be aware of when considering marriage – either their own marriage, or a marriage of a family member or friend.

LIFELONG COMMITMENT

1. Those getting married must firmly know in their mind that an Ananda Marga marriage is a lifelong commitment to one another for society building. The main idea is for both to take care of their progeny and make their children into bonafide members of society. There is no other outlook than this.

THE BOY AND GIRL MUST TALK AT LENGTH

2. The two young people – the future husband and spouse – must get ample scope to talk beforehand. They must get the opportunity to get to know one another and decide for themselves if this is a good match. Here it should be clarified that “getting to know one another” does not mean dating or being boyfriend and girlfriend. The boy and girl can get to know one another in a neutral setting. We can all think and decide what that setting should be. It should be supervised, safe, yet private enough that they can talk freely.

a) They should talk about their goals and aims of life. They should frankly discuss what they want. It is not that the parents should decide if this is a good match. They should critically evaluate if they share a similar outlook.

b) The boy and girl should discuss things as basic as: Who will hold an outside job? Who will cook? Who will raise the children? Where will we live? All these basic existential points should be discussed as far as possible. Nothing should be left to assumption; one must not rely on preconceived notions. They both should openly and clearly review and compare their vision for how their life will progress.

Unfortunately, all too often these things are not discussed; and, in result, there is much confusion and disappointment after marrying. What happens next is separation, marriage breaking or even divorce.

CASE STUDY:

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN…

Last year, two people married with the false expectation that the other would do all the cooking and cleaning, etc. Both the husband and spouse worked outside the home and neither wanted to attend to any domestic duties. Hence their marriage became a mess because they had the wrong impression from the outset. Today, both of their families are involved daylong in settling their marital disputes.

This is what happens when such matters are not discussed ahead of time.

THE BOY AND GIRL MUST TALK AT LENGTH (Cont)

c) The boy and girl should also talk about their likes and dislikes. Firstly, they should talk about their role in Ananda Marga and their devotional link with Guru. If one is very involved in Ananda Marga and is attracted to sadhana and the other is from a margii family but has zero interest in Ananda Marga, then that marriage is not going to work. So the boy and girl must sincerely talk about their social and spiritual commitment to Ananda Marga ideals and Baba.

I know one margii family where the husband is somewhat dogmatic but the spouse wishes to sincerely practice Ananda Marga teachings. The husband attends Ananda Marga programs as well as other dogmatic religious gatherings and he tries to force his spouse to come to those as well. But she does not like to attend local religious events. This has become a source of tension and strife.

There are some margii marriages where the husband is very sincere in 16 Pts and other do’s and don’ts, but the spouse has other interests and ways of living. So she raised the children in her own way, different from Ananda Marga. In result, the husband has become a stranger in his own house. Sometimes he wishes to sing kiirtan out loud, but with fear he does not do. He wants a home based on Ananda Marga socio-cum-spiritual ideals, but something else is going on. If any margii visits, then the spouse is not at all happy.

d) Next the young man and young lady should talk about their own personal likes and dislikes related with everyday life – everything: music, sports, literature, food, movies, friendships, cars, exercise, reading, college or university studies, habits etc. They should get a full picture of one another.

e) As far as possible, the boy and girl should get a clear cut vision of each other’s mental outlook. Without that, they definitely should not marry.

Namaskar,
in Him,
Vikram

The section below demarcated by asterisks is an entirely different topic,
completely unrelated to the above letter. It stands on its own as a point of interest.
*******************************
In Ananda Marga Guru Puja is one Lesson

“Question: What is pratyáhára?”

“Answer: Pratyáhára is derived: prati – á – hr + ghaiṋ. The word áhára literally means “assimilating” or “taking something within”. As a yogic practice, pratyáhára means “withdrawal of the mind from external objectivity and goading the withdrawn mind toward Parama Puruśa”. (Yoga Psychology, Questions and Answers on Meditation)

“You must bring about a revolutionary change in the flow of your judgment and thought, and see how, after overcoming your fascination with external colour, your mind becomes tinged with the His glorious colour. In Ananda Marga Sadhana, the method of withdrawing the mind from degrading tendencies, and absorbing oneself in the colour of the Great, is called Pratyáhára Yoga (the yoga of withdrawal) or Varńárghyadána (the offering of colours). All people have a particular attraction for one or another object or activity and as soon as they become attracted to an object, then their minds become coloured with the colour of that object. You can withdraw your mind from the colour of that object and dye yourself in His colour by offering Him the captivating colour of the object that has attracted you: this is the real Pratyáhára Yoga. The word Pratyáhára means “to withdraw” – to withdraw the mind from its object.” (Subhasita Samgraha – 3, Vibration, Form and Colour)

Note: In Astaunga Yoga, there are 8 limbs – one of which is pratyahara. We practice that as Guru puja as part of our regular sadhana routine. Guru puja is very important. After sadhana, one should always do Guru puja, and Guru puja can also be done on its own. After all, it is a lesson. By this way, one’s attachment for mundane things slowly fades away. It is a perfect science. If, after practicing Guru puja, one is unable to get rid of their worldly attachments and / or a particular mental weakness, then best is to consult an acarya. In Senior Acarya Diary, Baba has given a detailed science and method for practicing Guru puja. One should learn how to do this from any acarya, one on one.
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To: AM-GLOBAL
Subject: Donkey Birthday
From: Nityanirainjan@4sign…
Date: Tue, 05 Feb 2013 23:04:37

Baba

“A’loker path cha’r’ibo na’…A’mi nijere praca’r koribo na’…” (P.S. 337)

Purport:

Baba, by Your grace I will not leave the path of Ananda Marga ideology, the path of effulgence. I will never leave the path which You showed me. By Your grace, I will mold myself according to Your desire. With Your guidance, I will make my mind straight, focusing on You & propagating Your glory. I will never glorify my own existence. I will never propagate about my own personality. I will never praise myself in front of anyone. I will never propagate myself. O’ my Lord, You have taught me to propagate Your glory. I will propagate the glory of Parama Purusa – not anyone else. So I will never propagate my own self…

== DONKEY BIRTHDAY ==

Namaskar,
On and off we hear how some fallen avadhuta has come off the true path. In result, they engage in bizarre behaviour. Here are a few examples of what some have done.

We should ensure other workers do not indulge in a similar manner. If you know of more cases, please let us know. The aim here is to enhance the standard of our Wt cadre – not anything else.

INITIATION MEANS REBIRTH

Baba’s teaching that during initiation one gets re-birth. So in this situation, we should all consider & rethink the notion of celebrating one’s physical birth.

“With an initiated person the first birth was the physical birth and the second birth was the spiritual birth, during initiation. Such a person is divya, born twice: First, you are simply born as an animal being. But this second time, as a human being. So unless and until one is initiated one is not, one cannot be, treated as a human being.” (1)

Thus the physical birth does hold much value in the life of a spiritual aspirant. When they get initiated onto the path of dharma sadhana, that is their real birth – i.e. when the person gets initiated and takes shelter at Rev. Baba’s feet.

PART LIFE VS FULL LIFE

Regarding birthdays, it also has to be mentioned that our present life is nothing but a part life. It is not a full life. Our life began when our consciousness first emanated from the Cosmic Hub. Since that time we have undergone incarnation after incarnation.

Baba says, “After millions of animal lives, a created being attains the human form…” (2)

Baba says, “In Sanskrit, dvi means “two” and ja means “born”, so dvija means “twice born”…the first birth was the physical birth, and the second birth was the spiritual birth, during initiation.” (3)

Thus, one should not think that when the spermatozoa fertilised the egg and led to this particular birth, then that is one grand birthday event.

Our life is spiritual oriented, not goaded toward the mundane.

Thus, every sadhaka in the Marga should think twice about how far they should celebrate their “birthday”. For workers, there is no question of celebrating as they have given up everything of their unit existence for Baba. At each and every juncture or stage of an avadhuta’s development and training they are given a new name because each stage itself represents a new birth– a new beginning, all the while leaving behind their old life. In which case, where is the scope for an avadhuta to celebrate his own worldly birthday.

Indeed, all sadhakas in the Marga should take a moment and consider the points in this letter and see if really they feel it appropriate and beneficial to celebrate their own birthday.

SOME NAIVE PEOPLE MAY RAISE THIS QUESTION

Some naive persons may raise the question that when Baba has given the birthday celebration chapter in Caryacarya, then what is wrong if our avadhutas celebrate their birthday? The answer is quite clear. In Caryacarya, Baba also explains what type of meat a person should eat if they cannot resist eating meat. But that does not mean sincere sadhakas and avadhutas should also eat meat or that we should appreciate meat eating.

Remember, Caryacayra is our smrti shastra – our social code – which is not eternal. It depends upon time, space, and person. All kinds of people are coming into Ananda Marga. For some, Baba has given such rules for periods of transition onto the path of dharma.

Everyone knows that in Ananda Marga there are three types of sadhakas: pashvacariis, viiracariis, and divyacariis. Pashvacariis are half-margiis; viiracariis are mediocre sadhakas, and those who are very strict and do not compromise on points of dharma are divyacariis. There will always be a mixture of all three grades of sadhakas. Always, new people are coming into human life and they will enter onto the path of pashvacara. After many lives and with God’s grace they will one day become viiracariis.

This point of eating meat in Caryacarya is for pashvaraiis. They compromise on various aspects of 16 points, but they are also margiis. They live amongst us – we all know this and recognize who is who. A person may not openly declare, “I am a pashvcarii; I am a half-margii”, but everyone knows.

When such pashvacariis become strong, established margiis, their manner will be different. Then they will not do such things like eating meat and celebrating their birthday.

Just as meat-eating is a hindrance to those on that path of sadhana. Similarly, indulging in self-glorification – such as celebrating one’s birthday – is not conducive to one’s spiritual growth and development. Rather it is antithetical. Our spiritual philosophy condemns all forms of self-glorification.

BIRTHDAY IS WORSE THAN SELF-PRAISE

As we all know, Baba warns us to steer away from things like self-publicity & self-praise. Thus, when the chief result of indulging in one’s own birthday party is drawing attention to oneself, then no avadhuta should indulge in such acts.

Baba says, “Why on earth should he indulge in self-publicity? To whom will he publicize himself? Such acts are the antics of common, avaricious people with beggar-like mentality.” (4)

And to go one step further, in the case of one’s own birthday party, that is not only praising oneself but even worse – celebrating and overtly highlighting one’s unit cause.

Overall, it is just like how stealing itself is bad yet the annual celebration of a notorious stealing program is far worse.

BABA’S ORDER:

MUST NOT GLORIFY ONESELF

Here Baba is clearly warning that human beings, let alone our avadhutas and acaryas, must not be involved in self-glorification by holding birthday parties and singing songs of their own greatness. One must not do such things.

Ananda Marga philosophy says, “Kiirtana should be done on Hari and on no other entity. One should not praise oneself or any other person. There are many people who are very fond of praising themselves by telling everyone what wonderful things they have done, but, as mentioned in this sloka, kiirtana is not for one’s own self but for Hari. Even though people are taught to do kiirtana for Hari, they still make the mistake of praising themselves too much. Sometimes their self-praise is so intense that others are obliged to say, “Please stop praising yourself so much.” They forget that their self-applause is rather boring for others. Human beings should realize that no one likes to hear the self-praise of others.” (5)

Even though a few degraded workers may enjoy the display of their own petty glory, such ostentatious displays are not received well in the society. This will tarnish the image of all workers who have come on this earth to selflessly serve others, not glorify themselves.

Here Baba gives the formula for how to become great.

“It is action that makes a person great. Be great by your sa’dhana’, by your service, by your sacrifice.” (6)

SPRIIT OF AVADHUTA

The spirit of being Avadhuta is to dedicate everything to Marga Gurudev. By getting Avadhuta diiksa and by getting their new avadhuta name, they they no longer have anything of their own. In that blessed state, everything belongs to Shrii Shrii Anandamurtiji. And Shrii Shrii Anandamurtiji is their mother father, & everything. That is the oath they have taken.

They surrender their all – their entire I-feeling – at His lotus feet. Their name has changed; their address has changed; their identity has changed. They have no past connection with their worldly life, nor their worldly birth. Avadhutas give everything to Parama Purusa – they have nothing left to call their own.

That is why in the conduct rules of Avadhuta, there is no such thing as the observance of one’s own birthday or any form of celebration or glorification of one’s own unit existence. Rather the avadhuta’s goal of life and the be-all end-all of their existence is to glorify Baba’s image. They are to be established solely in Marga’s Guru’s glory.

“Avadhuta shall always keep himself engaged in the service of Gurudeva with sincerity and devotion, in thought, words and deed, in subtle and in crude spheres, in inner and outer expressions of life.” (7)

In that case, there is not an iota of scope to celebrate one’s own unit birthday. Our wholetimers are to think about Him and focus on the Goal.

Tadekam’ smara’mah…Tadekam’ nidha’nam’

“That Cosmic Entity alone should be created in your mind and no other object…He is the terminating point. He is the Supreme Desideratum.” (8)

WHY ONE SHOULD NOT CELEBRATE THEIR BIRTHDAY

Why should anyone practice or propagate their own birthday? We are raising the slogan Parama Pita Baba Ki Jai! His victory, His glory, that is why the real devotee has only one birthday to celebrate. That is Ananda Purnima – Baba’s birthday. But those who do not have that type of devotion, with faltering steps they may go away from the ideological path.

You may have also noticed that the birthdays of acaryas and avadhutas were never published in different magazines prior to 1990. And now also, we do not recogise the birthdays of acaryas and avadhutas via different media like e-mail or organisational news publications etc.

Thus, the birthdays of our wholetime workers are not to be celebrated nor even mentioned publicly. Even in their individual life, a Wt should not think, “Today is my worldly birthday.” There is no scope for that in our Ananda Marga Wt cadre.

MARRIAGE IS NOT FOR WTS

In Caryacarya, Baba has given all kinds of ceremonies – marriage etc – for the general society, including birthday celebrations. But no avadhuta or WT should blindly think that therefore that birthday celebration is for them anymore than they should think that the marriage ceremony is for them. Those types of things in Caryacarya are for others, not our wholetimer acaryas.

JUST DONKEY’S BIRTHDAY

In Ananda Marga, if anything is done for superficial show or in an insincere manner then that is not at all acceptable. For instance, if someone serves you food only to show how great they are then Baba terms that food as: Donkey Food.

“If food is not offered with that heart-felt feeling then that food is donkey food, gardabha’nna. So one must not eat that food.” (9)

Similarly sadhana done with the primary motive of showing one’s greatness instead of pleasing Parama Purusa is donkey sadhana. And if kiirtan is sung with the primary motive as a display of one’s musical talent and instead of to spread the glory of the Lord, then that is donkey kiirtan.

Likewise, when any Wt or avadhuta celebrated their own birthday in their honour instead of spreading the glory of Parama Puruas, then their celebration is a donkey birthday.

Namaskar,
In Him,
Nityanirainjan Deva

Note 1: SOME FAKE AVADHUTAS INVOLVED IN BIRTHDAY ANTICS

About any such cases where Wts go against their own code of conduct – by celebrating their worldly birthday etc – Baba has given the following teaching:

“Mana na’ ra’inga’ile ra’inga’ile yogi ka’par’a.

Saffron and red do not a yogiis make
With mind undyed he remains a fake.”

“Dye your mind with His colour. Those who have not done so cannot attain Him, for this very coloration is Prema or Divine Love… No external sign of Sa’dhuta’ or virtue is necessary. Become sa’dhu within. Behind the external show of virtuousness of many so-called sa’dhus exists a pharisaic state of mind. Preserve the true dignity of the word, Sa’dhu.”

“Mu’d’ha mu’ra’ye jata’ v’ar’aye….

With shaven head or matted locks
And ashen body a Sadhu walks
With the swaggering gait of a well-fed buffalo.
And crude mind filled with thoughts mean and low.”

“That is why I say that you must bring about a revolutionary change in the flow of your judgment and thought, and see how, after overcoming your fascination with external colour, your mind becomes tinged with the His glorious colour.” (10)

(A) Some time back in Jharsguda (Orissa, India), there was a big birthday party event held in honour of of so-called Dada Priyakrsnananda.

For those not aware, Dada Priyakrsnananda has years and years of experience in Ananda Marga and even in his early years in the Marga he was a Central Worker who lived close to Baba. But unfortunately, those years he was like a rock in a river. Just as the water never touches the inside of the rock despite the rock being immersed in the water, similarly Priyakrsnananda Dada was living in Centre surrounded by Baba’s physical presence for many years, but internally he could not get drenched. That is why he is like a rock in the river – or what we can say.

Perhaps most surprising is that there were many, many so-called senior workers on hand for this birthday gala event and in one big round, they all sang Prabhat Samgiita #135, “Janma dine…”, in order to celebrate Priyakrsnananda’s birthday.

This type of dogmatic occasion is 100% against the ethics of our Ananda Marga and it sets a very negative example.

(B) Not surprisingly then, more recently in SUVA sector, the very so-called senior Dada Paramatmananda and so-called Didi Ananda Shamiita organised two birthday parties. And once again, they both insisted that PS #135, “Janma dine…”, be sung. Thus with printed song sheets etc that Dada and Didi made sure that the birthday event was celebrated with Prabhat Samgiita.

Our so-called senior most workers do not understand the basic principles about Ananda Marga and Prabhat Samgiita. They have forgotten Guru’s teachings and guidelines.

(C) Some years ago at New York sector’s Boston Regional retreat, Ac. Rainjitananda Avt celebrated his own birthday with full gusto and glory. In grand fashion, everyone present at the retreat sang a hearty round of the traditional American “Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You” song in so-called Dadaji’s honor. And during the singing one sumptuous cake was brought out and served to so-called Dadaji. And like that the whole affair took on the flavor of one mundane Americana birthday party whereby non-margiis make a wish for mundane objects as they blow out the candles on the birthday cake and receive presents from one and all etc. So like that Rainjitanandji’s celebratory occasion and birthday party was carried out whereby Dada accepted the card and cake and all arrangements in his own honour. Because at that moment so-called Dadaji’s birthday was the showcase event going on at the retreat.

Note 2: MORE ABOUT DONKEY SADHANA, DONKEY KIIRTAN, AND DONKEY FOOD

For more about Baba’s teachings in this regard:

http://am-global-01.blogspot.com/2012/12/donkey-food-donkey-sadhana-donkey.html

REFERENCES:
1. Ananda Vacanamrtam – 30, Twice Born
2. Ananda Va’nii #33
3. Ananda Vacnamrtam – 30
4. Subhasita Samgraha – 2, p. 49
5. Ananda Vacanamrtam – 8
6. Ananda Vanii #20
7. Rule no. 28 of 32 Rules for Avadhutas
8. Ananda Vacanamrtam – 2
9. Summary of Shabda Cayanika – 20, p.163-64 [Bangla]
10. Subhasita Samgraha part 3

The section below demarcated by asterisks is an entirely different topic,
completely unrelated to the above letter. It stands on its own as a point of interest.

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Why Some Like To Sacrifice For Others And Some Do Not

Baba says, “People recollect the tasty dishes they once relished and derive pleasure from that. Other people delight in feeding others. They offer rasagollás or sweets, and at the time of giving, imagine that their guest is enjoying the same delightful taste, the same sweet vibration from the rasagollás which they once relished when they ate them. A host feels mental satisfaction by imagining that the guest’s mind is full of those pleasing vibrations. The host wants the guest to enjoy more and more of those delightful vibrations, and therefore asks the guest to accept the offer of more rasagollás. So, one enjoys pleasure in two ways: first, by eating the delicious things; and secondly, by recollecting the pleasing vibrations enjoyed in the past while eating those very same delicacies. The human mind has two contradictory inherent tendencies: one of acquisition, the other of sacrifice. The more one advances along the path of evolution, the more the tendency, the spirit of sacrifice, becomes prominent.” (Yoga Psychology, ‘Faculty of Knowledge-2’)

Note: In His above teaching Baba is illustrating two opposition psychologies:
(A) The science behind why people feel mental satisfaction by feeding delicious food to others.
(B) The mentality of those who themselves eat delicious food yet do not desire to feed others.

In the first scenario, people get derive great happiness from feeding others a tasty meal. But how exactly does this work? What is happening in the mind. Well, suppose one day Govinda ate a sumptuous meal which he enjoyed very much. Then a week or a month letter, Govinda prepares and serves that same type of food to his friend Tanmay. The meal is delicious and Tanmay enjoys every morsel. But that is not all. Govinda himself derives great mental pleasure in feeding Tanmay, even though he (Govinda) is not eating. How does this happen? In his own mind, Govinda recollects how much he enjoyed that meal and he thinks that just as he enjoyed it, similarly Tanmay is also enjoying that meal. This creates a sympathetic vibration in Govinda’s mind he feels great psychic fulfillment. So Govinda’s is taking delight in sacrificing and serving Tanmaya.

In contrast, a third person, Liilamaya, cooks food for himself and eats it all himself. And he becomes happy thinking how much he enjoyed the food. In this case, Liilamaya is deriving enjoyment from directly eating that food; he does not want to share it with others. There is no spirit of sacrifice, rather he delights in acquiring that food and filling his own belly.

Both scenarios start from the same point – both enjoy their food; but then, due to proper and or a lack of proper sadhana, things go in 2 contradictory directions. One sadhaka derives happiness by sacrificing, while the other becomes happy by direct acquisition.

These are two radically different psychologies. They are not related solely with food but with all kinds of indulgences and offerings. Some gain pleasure from acquiring something directly, and some become happy by sacrificing and watching others enjoy.

Finally Baba explains that the path of sacrifice is the higher path and as people develop, the more they will adhere to the path of sacrifice.
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Date: Mon, 19 Nov 2012 20:26:55 -0400
To: am-global@earthlink.net
From: Miguel
Subject: Marriage Crisis: West Moving Fast to Matriarchal & Libertine Society

Baba

MARRIAGE CRISIS:

WEST MOVING FAST TO MATRIARCHAL & LIBERTINE SOCIETY

Namaskar,
These days the trend of living in the west is moving towards the matriarchal system. Due to the libertine way of living, women alone raise most of the children & more and more kids are using their mother’s family name, as they do not know who their father is.

There is a crisis going on – and it is only worsening as the libertine ways of capitalist materialism leap frog from one place to the next. And no longer is this issue related only to the west. It is spreading – fast.

Now is the time we need to implement Baba’s teachings and ideals. Otherwise society will continue to suffer terribly.

Now is the time we should implement an arranged marriage system – per our Ananda Marga ideals. Hearing this, many of you may be thinking, “Arranged marriages!! That will bring us back to the stone age!” When in fact, the opposite is true. If we fail to provide structured support to women in the marriage process, society will continue to tailspin into that era of old – the libertine system that was in vogue prior to Lord Shiva.

WHY DOES ANANDA MARGA SUPPORT ARRANGED MARRIAGES

AND HOW IS SOCIETY BENEFITED

In Ananda Marga, Baba guides us that we are to maintain the dignity of women. Helping women arrange a marriage will create a stable and dependable future for them – and their offspring. It is a win-win situation. Plus it helps protect men as well as it saves the from degeneration.

Here arranged marriage does not mean that the bride-to-be cannot select their spouse. It does not refer to those archaic weddings of rural India where the bride and groom would not even recognise each other if they saw one another on the way to the wedding. Rather, it refers to a rational approach where both have met and spoken with one another. Furthermore, it is a pathway toward marriage where those watching for the welfare of the girl – her guardians and parents – should help in the process of meeting a suitable spouse. In due course, naturally the boy and girl (or young man and young woman) will meet and talk to see if they feel comfortable with one another. And ultimately, the prospective bride and groom will have the final say. The arranging of the marriage means that the girl need not be on her own to find a spouse.

GIRLS: EMOTIONAL SCARRING & PSYCHOLOGICAL PAIN

Unfortunately, that is what happens now in western, materialistic societies. The girl searches alone for a spouse. And in that process, women repeatedly give in to the sensual desires of men, and most often end up pregnant, and not married. Or they end up in one relationship after another – hoping to find marriage – yet watching the man walk away each time. That leaves the female with emotional scarring and psychological pain. The counseling centers in the west are filled with such victims.

The answer then is to create a system where the well-wishers of the girl and boy gather and talk. It is a collective process where society takes responsibility for the safety, comfort, dignity, and happiness of the girl – and boy. By this way, the bride-to-be need not allow her body to be exploited by libertine males. By this way, there will be no child out of wedlock – lacking a father. By this way the physical, emotional, psychic, and spiritual needs and safety of the girl and her offspring are at the forefront.

Perhaps in another letter, someone can offer more details about how to best implement and oversee an arranged marriage system. Because without it, the way things are going now, it is only from bad to worse.

If you have any doubts at all, please read the following. Then you will see how the present-day libertine approach is sending society back to the stone ages.

STATISTICS OF THIS PRESENT ERA

First, here are some statistics for your review:

– Approximately 84% of custodial parents are mothers;

– 45% of the women are currently divorced or separated;

– 34.2% of the women have never been married;

– Unmarried mothers gave birth to 4 out of every 10 babies born in the United States in 2007, a share that is increasing rapidly both here and abroad;

– 11,000 babies are born daily in the US; at minimum, 4,500 babies are born out of wedlock – without a father. This trend is on the rise.

The situation is dire and what is happening now in the west will soon be happening in the east – as the eastern world is fast copying all of the western social trends.

The irony of all this is that in this ultra-modern era we are fast falling into the ways of those pre-historic humans. Those early humans led libertine lives and now the same thing is going on. It is most ironic that we think of those early humans as being uncivilised and we think of ourselves as being highly civilised, yet on this critical point of promiscuity and child rearing, we share the same negative ways.

ARE WE CIVILISED?

Thus, are we – the present day humans – civilised? That is what we should all consider when reading this letter and reviewing Baba’s teachings.

What was so rampant 8000yrs ago is going on today in so-called developed countries. This “loose” lifestyle has become the accepted norm; it is the fashion.

Unmarried boys and girls are sleeping together and producing offspring. Thereafter, males are not taking responsibility for the children.

To understand this fully we must review the history. Then we can properly evaluate if how far we have progressed: Are we civilised or not.

We have to to be alert to the fact that as fast as the selfishness of capitalism is growing, the libertine way of life is spreading all around. Today so many children are born out of wedlock and many will never meet their father. In a decade, almost all will be born without a father. This negative trend is only increasing.

The general society is undergoing the disastrous consequences in the form of sky-rocketing crime and so many other social ills. Because of a lack of parental love, such children cannot grow properly.

BABA’S TEACHINGS & WARNINGS ON LIBERTINE LIFE:

CHILDREN SUFFER THE MOST

Best is to propagate Baba’s teaching; due to a blatant lack of knowledge all this is happening.

Baba says, “Long ago there used to be a popular and interesting folktale. In very ancient times, as with other animals, there was no custom of marriage among human beings. As far as it can be ascertained, this situation certainly continued until the middle of the Rgvedic age and likely until towards the end of that age. It was said during that time that there was once a five-year-old boy, the son of a certain sage, who became perplexed when he saw his mother going off with another man and asked his father why his mother was going off with that other fellow like that.

The sage answered his son: “That’s the rule. Any woman can stay with any man whenever she likes. She can also leave him whenever she likes. In the same way, any man can go off with any woman at any time.”

The sage’s son asked: “Then what will I do?”

The sage replied: “Children who are breastfeeding will stay with their mother. Once they become too old for that they can stay wherever they like. Wherever they stay they have to make arrangements for their food in exchange for labour.”

“But that’s no good!” the sage’s young son exclaimed. “No good at all.”

“In most cases, it was generally seen that the father did not bear the responsibility for the maintenance of their offspring or any other kind of responsibility towards them. All responsibility fell on the mother’s shoulders. For this reason wicked men used to put straightforward-natured women into extreme difficulty. The womenfolk used to spend their time under great duress. If not all, at least most of the men did not shoulder any responsibility for their offspring. Most of them were libertine. This is not to say that there were not any libertine woman, but the number of such women was less. Moreover, the affection they felt towards their children was a very strong bond of attachment which they could not easily break. This situation among humans, which was similar to that of animals, had been going on for approximately one million years, that is, human beings appeared about one million years ago.”

“The women of that day stood at Shiva’s door and said: “O Sada’shiva, save us from this beastly, distressful condition. There is no man or woman strong enough today to lay down rules in this matter and to put them into practice with a firm hand.” Shiva’s heart melted; he understood their pain. He introduced the custom of marriage and firmly fixed the rights and responsibilities of the father. For the first time human beings felt the contact of a peaceful environment in social life.”

“Still some wicked-natured men remained and some libertine women as well. Then, with the help of his followers, Shiva obliged those wicked men to marry by punishing them with the rod and rope. Just as there were libertine men, there were also some libertine women. This libertine group became greatly frightened of Shiva.” (Shabda Cayanika – 2; Disc: 10)

BABA’S TEACHINGS & WARNINGS ON LIBERTINE LIFE (CONT)

Here are Baba’s further teachings on this point of a libertine society.

Baba says, ” At the beginning of evolution, humans used to lead libertine lives without any consideration for family obligations, but they gradually developed a family instinct. However, that family instinct was no different from that of the elephants, lions, pigeons, etc. Due to this inborn instinct, males and females arrived at a loose, but workable compromise regarding family life. But in that there was no sense of responsibility born out of a developed conscience; rather, due to their loose relationships with each other, one person used to desert another and go anywhere he liked. The number of such libertines was very high, and they used to disturb the peace and harmony of the so-called family members and become the cause of many serious quarrels.”

“The male libertines would not take responsibility for their offspring. They used to wander freely, and as a result, the entire responsibility for raising the children in their infancy would devolve on the mothers. But it was not possible for the mothers alone to bear the responsibility of maintaining the children, as a result of which many children died in early infancy. Those who survived felt themselves to be in a sea of troubles after they were weaned from their mother’s breast milk. Then they would be deprived of their mother’s love, since she had to take care of the next baby. Those were the days of the prehistoric humans. One should remember that even in those prehistoric days, some portion of the Vedas was composed, chiefly by the so-called family people. The life of the libertines was just like that of the animals.” (NSS, Disc: 9, Shivokti-3)

INCREASING PROBLEMS

So long as this trend is in vogue – so long as children are born out of wedlock and fathers are remiss in their responsibilities – as a society we are inviting so many problems. Such children cannot grow properly without proper maternal supervision, care and love. Due to financial pressures, a single mother cannot manage the demands and rigors of parenthood all by herself – in which case children are the big losers. They will come into this world devoid of the requisite love, attention and support to grow properly. And the tragedy is that this situation is on the rise – it will not be long before we are a mirror image of what was going on 8000 years ago.

The cause of libertine life in the prehistoric era was ignorance and today the cause is selfishness, but the result is the same. When all is said and done, it is the children who suffer most. And that has a most disastrous effect on society.

BABA’S BLESSING

By Baba’s grace we should all be aware of this problem and work to solve it. The Ananda Marga arranged marriage system would help tremendously. The present-day libertine epidemic should not be a surprise to us. We should clearly understand what is at stake and side by side help society to improve.

Namaskar,
Liilavati & Mantreshvar

Note: SOCIETY BUILDING IN ANANDA MARGA

The Ananda Marga marriage system is for society building. Marriage is a means to raising a family; it is not just for sex. If children are not born and raised properly, then society itself will become aged and die; a healthy, new generation is always needed. That enables society to grow. The Ananda Marga marriage system focuses on the welfare of the child; children are not a mere by-product of lust etc. Our approach is that marriage is for the proper nurturing and growth of the child. So they develop into great citizens and sadhakas.

PRABHAT SAMGIITA

Intro to PS: In this song the devotee is innocently sharing his inner heart feeling about that most loving Entity, Parama Purusa. Yet, unbeknownst to
him, the very Personality whom the devotee is communicating with is none other than Parama Purusa Himself. So that is the unique aspect of this song.

“A’ma’r gopan kathá jene niyeche” (PS 1272)

Purport:

My Parama Purusa is my most close and most dear; He is surrounding me in all the ways; I remain under His eternal shelter. He understands all the vibrations of my mind, all the feelings of my heart – all my secret tales. He knows me inside and out; He is aware about everything.

He understands the pain and longing of my heart; He knows what is good for me and what is bad for me; what is for my welfare; and, what I should and should not do. All these things He understands well. Parama Purusa is my everything – He is my Guardian.

Indeed my entire existence is within the palm of His hand. He knows everything about me. Whatever I try hide to from Him cannot remain hidden for long; everything gets exposed. Because He is well aware about my situation. Whatever I think, He understands. Nothing can be hidden from Him. Everything is within His reach. He brings everything into the light of His awareness.

He resides in the depths of my heart. And by His remaining there, my whole being gets saturated by His divine presence. So He is my most dear One. In my inner-heart and inner-mind He whispers sweet, loving things into my ears.

Parama Purusa is living in my heart and He knows everything. Indeed He is more aware about my whole existence than I am myself. And He constantly guides me and keeps me under His loving care and shelter. In that way I am moving – I feel so blessed…

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